Short Stories, Long Odds

So. I am learning a harsh lesson: if a company is totally awesome once you have no reason to expect them to be similarly awesome in the future.

We moved up to Massachusetts using a certain moving company, and it was terrific – the driver picked up our stuff, told us how much it weighed and what it cost after loading, drove it to Mass, let us know when he would show up. He was great.

I’ve never spoken to our current driver, and they shuttled our stuff away on December 17th. Up until today (which happens to be the day following the final day they had to deliver the stuff) did I find out where it was. Here’s the punchline – 12 days later, its still in Massachusetts.

They have no idea when it will get here, it might get loaded on the 3rd or 4th, but who is to say? Also, they are offering to pay for my hotel lodging and 2/3’s meals. The real kick in the junk is that if I were to stay in a hotel for, say, the 13 or 14 days it might be until our stufff gets here, I wouldn’t be able to pay for my stuff!

Oh man. So that’s what’s going on there. There has been some good news.

– the interweb runs to my new place.

I am sso out of the loop. I don’t feel bad about it because I’m preparing my place as a headquarters for our efforts to engage in a little ‘Come To Jesus’ action with Texas Democrats. So in that, I’m happy that my new apartment is big and servicable and I’ve been cleaning and getting it set up with Diana. The downside is that I don’t have much to say about current world events.

So here’s this – did you know Jerry Orbach was the voice of Lumiere in Beauty and the Beast?

While the War on Whatever continues in the spotlight, let’s take a moment to remember the War on Drugs and see how it’s going. Rather than criticize how it affects us locally, we’ll take a look at Colombia. BBC News ran a very brief article stating, “The Colombian anti-narcotics police have announced that a record number of drug crops were sprayed during 2004.”

It goes on to state that prices and supply haven’t changed; the drugs are even cheaper. Additionally, “The US authorities say this is due to drug stockpiles that the traffickers have been gradually selling off.”
The article inconclusively ends. Stating that drug farmers have switched tactics by growing smaller crop fields in areas hard to spot. With a little digging, evidence points to a more difficult reason.

Wired handled a journalist’s story to discover whether drug lords have been genetically modifying coca leaves to resist being sprayed. After a lot of reading, the lowdown is that farmers have simply selectively grown coca plants (called Boliviana negra) that resist glyphosate treatments. In truth, US aerial sprayings are doing a bit of the weeding work for these farmers.

While current US policy insists on the success of aerial eradication and damage being done to “narco-terrorists.” Again, a lack of foresight and creativity is demonstrated in handling or even acknowledging Boliviana negra.

“This war against narco-terrorism can and will be won and Colombia is well on its way to that victory,” said Bush. — In These Times

Sound familiar?

Bear with us while I get successfully installed back in Texas. Today we go get our place and then, you know, I have to call the movers and figure out when they’re going to decide to show up.

Hopefully Drek will hit you with the knowledge while I’m out of the loop. I’ll give propers later today if all goes as planned.

Waking up today is a challenge, both by conducting a meeting with some editors and reading this: Time really does it.

I went on a small bit of research to supply my next statement to TIME with the right numbers, and after wading through dozens of vote-fraud accusations. Substantiating these claims won’t be easy, but it’s necessary. Take a look around for claims that Bill Clinton stole his election.

Anyway, TIME’s person of the year award needed to go to “The Enduring American Citizen.” Or the enduring 48%.

Moving right along, does this sound familiar:

Q Sir, my unit, the 2nd Brigade — (inaudible) — Cav, we have five out of the six red zones in this country. And with the up- armored humvees, the new — (off mike) — humvees they’re bringing over with the — (inaudible) — those doors are not as good as the ones on the up-armored humvees — (inaudible). We even lost quite — we lost some soldiers due to them, and we’re trying to make a change — (inaudible). The question is, are we going to get more up-armored humvees?

And the reponse:

GEN. MYERS
“…I think it’s around 220, 225 per month. We’ve gathered them from all other services that had them except for a few we held back for a nuclear security role back in the United States. The rest of them shipped over here. We’re trying to get them to you as fast as we can…”

But, were you thinking about December… or 7 months ago?

Additionally, “it’s a matter of how fast can we build these things and get them over here.” Some companies still wait. A local Arizona company, ArmorWorks, reported they could also easily double production – it wasn’t a matter of logistics, it was waiting for a phone call.

My challenge for this post was trying to not sound bitter.

It totally kills to blow through Connecticut, Pennsylvania, West Virginia, Ohio and land in Indiana all the same day.

Our trip is going well so far. We had the last minute packing, last minute cleaning, last minute cash, last minute paperwork, and last minute cheesesteak courtesy of Angela’s. That was yesterday.

We had hoped to leave Boston at around 5 o’clock but things didn’t work out that way (of course) so we left at 9. We had been hearing all about nasty weather for the trip so we wanted to start putting as much ground between us and the Great, Angry Lakes as possible. We got to Hartford and decided that ending up at the Home Of The Whale gave us a pretty good jump on the next day.

REVELATION 1: CONNECTICUT MAKES YOU SLEEPY.
Seriously, we were fine and excited about the trip this morning, but I think the air in Connecticut is laced with qualuudes. And I can’t figure out why the fuck everyone was in such a hurry, except for the people with New York plates.

REVELATION 2: PEOPLE GET ANGRY WHEN YOU CALL YOU SELF “MERLIN THE JEW-DUNKER” ON WALL GRAFFITO
Some guy had actually written that on the requisite wall writing space by the phone in Eastern PA. Next to it, some one had carved in giant angry letters: “SHUT UP CAMEL JOKEY”. So Okey Dokey Pokey, I guess.

REVELATION 3: NOT A LOT GOING ON IN PENNSYLVANIA
When you can say “Wow, Ohio is way more exciting than that was.” your state is not exciting. It is worth mentioning that Ohio’s governor’s name is Bob Taft, and while I know nothing about his specific physiology, I imagine that if he is enormous and perpetually stuck in the gubernatorial tub it may give Ohio an unfair advantage.

REVELATION 4: OMG IT IS COLD!!1!
The low when we wake up tomorrow in Richmond, IN is 8.

8.

It could be worse. We could be where my friend Chris Braddock is in North Dakota, where not only is the temperature literally below zero, but the wind chill factor is -31.

REVELATION 5: XMRADIO IS AWESOME
It is highly entertaining to have Air America and Fox News right next to each other on the dial.

As for the news, things are actually kind of coming up Milhouse for liberals – the White House is embarassed about the Kerik ordeal, no one is really buying into Bush’s “economic summit” (and oh man will I have plenty to say about that soon enough), and this silly business about Social Security’s Imminent Wanton Destruction is under fire from all sides.

We railed through about 750 miles today. White Castle will send us on our way to the hopeful destination of Tulsa, OK tomorrow morning.