Short Stories, Long Odds

It totally kills to blow through Connecticut, Pennsylvania, West Virginia, Ohio and land in Indiana all the same day.

Our trip is going well so far. We had the last minute packing, last minute cleaning, last minute cash, last minute paperwork, and last minute cheesesteak courtesy of Angela’s. That was yesterday.

We had hoped to leave Boston at around 5 o’clock but things didn’t work out that way (of course) so we left at 9. We had been hearing all about nasty weather for the trip so we wanted to start putting as much ground between us and the Great, Angry Lakes as possible. We got to Hartford and decided that ending up at the Home Of The Whale gave us a pretty good jump on the next day.

REVELATION 1: CONNECTICUT MAKES YOU SLEEPY.
Seriously, we were fine and excited about the trip this morning, but I think the air in Connecticut is laced with qualuudes. And I can’t figure out why the fuck everyone was in such a hurry, except for the people with New York plates.

REVELATION 2: PEOPLE GET ANGRY WHEN YOU CALL YOU SELF “MERLIN THE JEW-DUNKER” ON WALL GRAFFITO
Some guy had actually written that on the requisite wall writing space by the phone in Eastern PA. Next to it, some one had carved in giant angry letters: “SHUT UP CAMEL JOKEY”. So Okey Dokey Pokey, I guess.

REVELATION 3: NOT A LOT GOING ON IN PENNSYLVANIA
When you can say “Wow, Ohio is way more exciting than that was.” your state is not exciting. It is worth mentioning that Ohio’s governor’s name is Bob Taft, and while I know nothing about his specific physiology, I imagine that if he is enormous and perpetually stuck in the gubernatorial tub it may give Ohio an unfair advantage.

REVELATION 4: OMG IT IS COLD!!1!
The low when we wake up tomorrow in Richmond, IN is 8.

8.

It could be worse. We could be where my friend Chris Braddock is in North Dakota, where not only is the temperature literally below zero, but the wind chill factor is -31.

REVELATION 5: XMRADIO IS AWESOME
It is highly entertaining to have Air America and Fox News right next to each other on the dial.

As for the news, things are actually kind of coming up Milhouse for liberals - the White House is embarassed about the Kerik ordeal, no one is really buying into Bush’s “economic summit” (and oh man will I have plenty to say about that soon enough), and this silly business about Social Security’s Imminent Wanton Destruction is under fire from all sides.

We railed through about 750 miles today. White Castle will send us on our way to the hopeful destination of Tulsa, OK tomorrow morning.